photos by Tell The Birds
Shirt- The Shine Project
use code “myyear” for 10% off through the weekend!!!
I’m sitting in my yoga pants on the rainiest day Phoenix has had all season.
For some reason, almost every year it’s warm except for on New Year’s Eve and everyone gets stressed out because we’re not used to it being below 60 degrees and we’re definitely not used to moisture.
It’s not anticipated, and it’s not expected and the city is on the phone with each other asking
“NOW what are we going to do tonight?!”
I think that’s why everyone likes the idea of a New Year so much. We get to look back on the times it has stormed on our parade throughout the year, get a good laugh because enough time has passed from the initial sting of things, and realize what a blessing all of our trials were because of where we are now.
In 2014 I almost gave up several times. Or, I felt like giving up, but in my heart of hearts knew that I actually wouldn’t. 2014 was a tremendous trial and error. It was full of blessings of learning, loss, anxiety and triumph. 2014 set me up for this coming year. Because 2015 is my year.
It’s your year, too. Because we’ve been prepared for it and can handle trials and set backs better than we used to. It’s our year because our path has led us here, and we’re about to let ourselves loose.
But there were times where my course and path seemed up in the air.
Here are 5 times I almost gave up in 2014:
Near the beginning of the summer, literally every, single, thing that could fall into place in my life and my business did. My sister worked for me full time during it all, and I remember calling her one day crying saying, “I feel like I’m in a dream. This is all too good to be true, how could everything possibly be this perfect right now?! I hate to say it but I’m actually nervous that it’s about to all crash down because this kind of stuff just doesn’t happen all at once.”
I soon learned that my nervousness was real. I was being prepared for one of the hardest next few months I have ever faced in my life. These months ended up teaching me how strong I am, what my potential is, and how aware God is of me.
1- There was a week this past year that my family and I were all on a work trip together, but also had a major family situation going on that was out of our control. It was a time that had been prayed about for months, counseled on by people who I needed for help, and was a very high anxiety time for all of us.
Early one morning I woke up in my hotel bed and I couldn’t breathe. I emotionally was so stressed, anxious, and upset that physically it was inflicting some of the most pain on me that I have ever felt. For the next few hours I struggled for breathes of air, while my heart burned in a way that it got to a point where I thought I was dying from a heart attack. I’ve never been consumed by so much fear, and physical and emotional pain as I was in that moment. It was literally destroying me.
The firefighters got to our hotel room, and after a series of tests told me that all my vitals were normal.
How could they be normal. I feel like I am going to die at any moment.
On the way out one of them looked at me and said,
Have you been under extreme stress lately? I think you’re having an anxiety attack.
And so it was. My body couldn’t handle the emotional turmoil I was inflicting on myself and it was something that I couldn’t control. After that I struggled with figuring out if I can be the type of mom I need to be, run a business, and have the type of crazy life that we do.
The struggle lasted a very, very long time.
But here I am, and my fear didn’t win.
2- We had been talking for several months about partnering with someone and were making plans to have outside help to make The Shine Project explode this coming year. We spent a lot of time on planning and getting things together for something we thought was a good fit at the time.
Long story short, it wasn’t a good fit. At the end of the summer I was left to hurry and plan our holiday, try to scrounge up a new website, and figure out the beginning of what 2015 was going to look like for us. One night I got home late and told my husband that I don’t think I could work this hard anymore, that I was tired and wondered if it was worth it. He reminded me of why I do this.
I decided to keep pushing through, and a couple months later we had the best holiday season we could have ever anticipated, providing us with what we need to make 2015 the best year yet.
3- For the first half of the year we put most of our time and resources in to a summer of doing custom sorority events and sales. I flew around the country during the summer selling at sorority events, and at one time was gone for 45 days with only a day or two at home during that time. It was tiring, and we were counting on a very high volume of sales. Well, we over projected. During one of the trips was when I had my anxiety attack and I couldn’t even work the show, my husband had to. Because the product was custom for the sorority we were selling to, if things didn’t sell, we were then left with a lot of product that we paid for. I invision taking a huge wad of cash and flushing it down the toilet crying as you say goodbye. That’s what the sorority tour felt like. We did okay, but not good enough to have that be the major thing we focused and planned for all year. I was devastated, I was tired, and I was so frustrated that I didn’t know what I was willing to keep sacrificing to keep The Shine Project going.
Since all of my major set backs last year happened in the same time frame, there were moments where I felt like I was going to be consumed by the hurricane of life and I didn’t know how to climb out of it.
My little fight in my wouldn’t quite. Every time I wanted to, I knew that I actually would never stop pursuing my dreams and goals of what type of company I want to own.
This has led me to where I am right now.
In my yoga pants.
Excited for 2015.
Excited for the failures I saw last year and the major success that over powered it all.
For the times of learning and growth that made me realize life is just hard. It doesn’t matter what you do, it’s hard for everyone and sometimes when things are beyond your control you can really feel overpowered. You’ll have your moment, and then all will be right with the world again.
I’ve learned in 2014. I’m stronger, and I’m trying to be better.
Join our community on Instagram and tag #theshineproject #thisismyyear so we can see what you’ve overcome and what you’re going to accomplish in these next 12 months.
2015 has been waiting for you.